No one prepares you for this part. They show you the adorable photos—triplets in matching outfits, smiling parents glowing with joy. But they never show you what it’s like when all three babies are crying at once, and you’ve barely slept more than an hour in five days.
I love my children more than anything, but some nights around 2:40 a.m., I sit at the edge of the bed with one baby in my arms and the other two wailing in the background, and I wonder—did we make a mistake?
We weren’t ready for three. We weren’t even fully ready for two. Emotionally, financially, logistically—we were struggling with one before the pregnancy. And now, it’s like we’ve been thrown into a storm with no compass. My husband, once endlessly patient, winces at the sound of the bottle warmer. We barely talk anymore, not out of anger, but out of sheer exhaustion. We pass each other like ghosts in the same house, too drained to connect. The love is still there, buried somewhere under the endless cycles of feeding, changing, soothing.
When we first learned we were expecting triplets, it felt like a miracle. A terrifying, beautiful miracle. We were excited, scared, overwhelmed. But no one warned us about this kind of fatigue—how it carves away at your health, your identity, your marriage.
Every day feels like survival. My body aches in ways I didn’t know were possible. I can’t remember the last time I ate without background crying, or showered without racing against a baby’s next meltdown. Friends—especially those without children—say, “Take it easy.” I want to laugh. There is no “easy” when there’s always someone needing something and you’re the only one who knows where the clean onesies are.
My husband Nathan tries. He really does. But I see the cracks forming in him too. He’s exhausted. We both are. The smiles are tighter, the silences heavier. It’s like we’re two people holding on to the same lifeboat, but slowly drifting apart.
And then, the thought creeps in—quiet but persistent. Maybe one of them would be better off with someone else. Maybe adoption isn’t giving up—it’s doing the right thing for a child who deserves more than two burned-out parents can offer. It’s not that I love any of them less. It’s that I love them so much it hurts to think I might be failing them.
I started looking into adoption. Quietly, cautiously. I read stories from parents who’d made that choice—some out of desperation, others out of hope. I reached out to agencies, explored the idea, wrestled with the guilt. And all the while, Nathan said nothing. But I could tell the thought had crossed his mind too.
Then one night, as we sat in silence while the babies finally slept, Nathan turned to me and whispered, “I’ve been thinking… maybe we should consider adoption. Not because we want to, but because we have to. For their sake.”
His words shattered me. The thing I hadn’t dared say out loud had just been spoken by the person I love most. And it wasn’t cruel—it was heartbreaking, honest, raw. I looked at him, unsure whether to cry or be relieved. “I can’t lose any of them,” I whispered. “They’re my babies.”
“I know,” he said. “But are we the best we can be for them? Right now, like this?”
And then the call came. My sister-in-law, Marie, who’s struggled for years to have children, reached out. She and her husband had talked and—if we were really considering adoption—they wanted to step in. Not just anyone. Family. People we trust. People who’d love one of our babies as fiercely as we do.
For a moment, everything seemed to pause. Marie would give that child a quiet, stable home. One-on-one attention. A life we weren’t sure we could give. And I trusted her. But still… my heart couldn’t let go.
Then something unexpected happened. Marie and Paul sat us down and shared something their family lawyer told them. Families like ours—overwhelmed, under-resourced, in the thick of early parenthood—were eligible for support programs we’d never known existed. Financial assistance. Counseling. Help with childcare. Resources designed for families in exactly our position.
For the first time in months, I felt hope instead of dread. Maybe adoption wasn’t the only path forward. Maybe we weren’t out of options. Maybe we just needed help—and the courage to ask for it.
So, we made a new decision. We didn’t place one of the triplets for adoption. Instead, we asked for help. We leaned on our family. We took advantage of the support that was available. We accepted that being strong doesn’t mean doing it all alone.
And that changed everything.
We’re still tired. Still overwhelmed. But now, we’re not drowning. We’re managing. We’re healing. And more importantly, we’re doing it together.
If you’re reading this and feel like you’re underwater, please know this: you’re not alone. There is no shame in reaching out, no weakness in needing support. Whether you’re raising one child or three, your strength lies not in doing everything by yourself, but in knowing when it’s time to let others help carry the load.
Asking for help saved our family. And it might save yours, too.